I was doing really well today. I got up, cleaned the kitchen, baked the cake, wrapped the presents and got everything prepared for the after-dinner festivities. Then, when I asked Football to get the video camera I had to excuse myself for a minute. This rush of tears just came over me and I couldn't fight it. It was so intense. I felt like I had been hit by a car - it came out of nowhere. All I could think about was how my soldier is going to feel in a few hours when he gets up and realizes its his baby girl's 2nd birthday and he can't be here to kiss her little face and look into her little eyes and tell her happy birthday. I know what he will be thinking and I know he will have a sick feeling in his stomach all day. I know that he will love the videos and pictures that we took but at the same time it will break his heart. Gosh- this is so freakin' hard. I'm so thankful and happy to have this beautiful little girl in our lives and to be able to celebrate another birthday with her and the boys and yet I am so, so sad that her daddy isn't here for this day. I'm so mixed up I don't know which way I'm going anymore.
I know I'll be fine and this day will soon pass. Half of me wants to savor it because I won't get it back and the other half just wants it to be over because the pain is too much at times.
I want to leave you with a happy moment from today. I think I'll print these pictures and put them on the fridge to keep the 'happy' up front in my mind. I need to do that for all of us.
I want to leave you with a happy moment from today. I think I'll print these pictures and put them on the fridge to keep the 'happy' up front in my mind. I need to do that for all of us.
This is the Teddy Bear Daddy wanted me to get for her. She loves it so much!
This one cracks me up because she is a tough little girl -especially with two brothers in the house but at the end of the day she is very feminine and loves her princess clothes!
10 comments:
You will make it!
What you did, to have it all ready for him in the morning was wonderful.
Just think of how great birthday #3 will be for you all.
I love the first and last photos.
She melts hearts that little monkey...
You did a wonderful thing for you soldier. I am sure it is going to be so hard on him as well. You will make it!!! I am off to mass this morning and I am going to say an extra prayer for you.
Love those pciture of t-monkey. She brings a smile to my face and melts the heart.
I admire your strength. That is a great thing you did for your husband.
And your daughter is just gorgeous! ;o) Love the photos.
I love the princess look at that age! They are adorable. I'm know your soldier will love the video and pictures despite it hurting to be gone. You are doing awesome!
What darling pictures--LOVE the last one!! And I agree with the rest of the commenters--you did an awesome thing for your soldier to have the birthday celebration sent to him.
She's adorable! I can only imagine how hard this is for you and for your soldier, but you'll make it and think of what a wonderful reunion you will have :)
She is so cute! Love it.
The holidays and milestones are rough when they are away. I remember paying the first lost tooth would just hand.in.there till Daddy got home from Iraq and it did but just barely.
Hugs to you and your wonderful family. You are a precious bunch.
You are such a strong, strong person. and t-money jr. is so cute I can hardly stand it.
I hope you are doing well!
Happy Birthday Little One!! She is adorable!
Happy belated birthday, pretty princess.
I'm sure your soldier was so very happy to get those videos and pictures.
The cake is beautiful and her hair is so, so, so lovely!!!!
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