Hurricane Gustav

As I sit here watching the reports on Hurricane Gustav is gives me much anxiety and worry for those we left behind in Louisiana when we moved. We lived through Katrina back in 2005 and of course, my soldier was in Iraq during that time too! I remember it as if it were yesterday. I was at work and my soldier was trying everything to get through to me because the Engineers in Iraq were tracking the storm. When he finally got through- he told me to send everyone home and pack my bags and get out ...NOW. I was scared to death. I'm alone, I have the two boys, a dog and two cats. I have no way to board up my house or even have time to gather everything I want to try and save. I did the best that I could and just focused on getting my children and myself to safety. Back then, my neighbors thought I was nuts for leaving so early (2 days early) because all of the hurricanes in the past had turned just in time and they were convinced we would be fine. A lot of lessons were learned after Katrina devastated southern Louisiana.

After having about an hour of nervousness because we couldn't find ANY gas, we finally found this tiny little gas station in the middle of nowhere and filled up. The boys and I have never prayed so hard in our lives. We made it all the way to Indiana safely and then we just had to wait until a neighbor could call us and tell us if the house survived or not. That was the longest week of our lives I think. Dan was being prepped to come back home as his commander knew that they would need him more in New Orleans and we would definitely need him at home. When we finally got the call that the house was ok I think I cried for 20 minutes. No water damage, no broken windows...nothing. We were the lucky ones. Two houses down, a tree fell on half of the house and destroyed it. Amazing.

Dan flew in successfully to Shreveport and then drove the rest of the way in. I drove from his Mom's house to meet him without the kids- not knowing what we would encounter. So our second reunion from a deploment was met with downed trees, no power, a very stinky fridge and just pure devastation all around us. We actually had three trees fall on our house but absolutely no damage. Well, except for one little branch through the roof. I'll take that. It was so surreal and everything had changed. It was so emotional.

We spent the next few days reaquainting while cleaning up debris and bleaching out a fridge and helping neighbors clean up as well.

We ended up being so blessed through the whole experience. A lot of my friends and co-workers weren't so lucky. Here are some pictures of our experience with Katrina in 2003. I ask that all of your prayers today are for the people of New Orleans and surrounding areas that are bracing for what could be another storm of devastation.

This is the back of our house. When we walked in the front door, this is what we saw. Our backyard was unbelievable. It was surreal to see all those trees pushed up against our house yet the only real damage was our fence was destroyed. Blessings I tell ya.

Our neighbors were so sweet that despite all of the mess and craziness, they still managed to put a Welcome Home balloon on our mailbox for Dan. It still makes me cry to see this!
This was the scene of our backyard. It still amazes me that our house was virtually untouched. I always say that it was as if God had picked up all of those trees and laid them gently on the house. It was a miracle.
This was one of the local schools that was completely destroyed. All the schools had to start new schedules because they had to 'borrow' another school's building for the kids that were displaced. Some went in the morning and some went in the afternoon.
This was the scene driving into the neighborhood. Every neighborhood in the area had a 'boil water' sign as you entered.
This is what was left of my job. I managed a weight-loss clinic. The owner lost all of her clinics- 4 total between New Orleans and Alabama.
We had service people from all over come to help clean up and provide red-cross services. We also had police from all over the country to help with safety and utility trucks from all over that came to help get power restored as quickly as possible. America is great, huh?

I have so many more and maybe I'll share some tomorrow. Don't forget to pray....

Bittersweet Birthday

Tomorrow, my little angel turns 2. I just can't believe it. It was seriously yesterday when I had her, I could swear by it. Football, Soccer and I celebrated her special day today, however so that when her daddy gets up in the morning in Iraq- he can enjoy the videos and pictures on her actual birthday instead of being delayed a day. He's 9 hours ahead of us so it gets kind of tricky sometimes.

I was doing really well today. I got up, cleaned the kitchen, baked the cake, wrapped the presents and got everything prepared for the after-dinner festivities. Then, when I asked Football to get the video camera I had to excuse myself for a minute. This rush of tears just came over me and I couldn't fight it. It was so intense. I felt like I had been hit by a car - it came out of nowhere. All I could think about was how my soldier is going to feel in a few hours when he gets up and realizes its his baby girl's 2nd birthday and he can't be here to kiss her little face and look into her little eyes and tell her happy birthday. I know what he will be thinking and I know he will have a sick feeling in his stomach all day. I know that he will love the videos and pictures that we took but at the same time it will break his heart. Gosh- this is so freakin' hard. I'm so thankful and happy to have this beautiful little girl in our lives and to be able to celebrate another birthday with her and the boys and yet I am so, so sad that her daddy isn't here for this day. I'm so mixed up I don't know which way I'm going anymore.

I know I'll be fine and this day will soon pass. Half of me wants to savor it because I won't get it back and the other half just wants it to be over because the pain is too much at times.
I want to leave you with a happy moment from today. I think I'll print these pictures and put them on the fridge to keep the 'happy' up front in my mind. I need to do that for all of us.

Here she is after blowing out her candles- She doesn't waste any time!

This is the Teddy Bear Daddy wanted me to get for her. She loves it so much!

This one cracks me up because she is a tough little girl -especially with two brothers in the house but at the end of the day she is very feminine and loves her princess clothes!

Remember Me?

Hey there- No, I didn't drop off the face of the earth or hide out in my house and hope it would all go away! I just now have had a chance to actually sit and blog. For the first time since I don't know when I actually put cleaning, laundry and organizing before anything else...including blogging. I know - it's not nice but I had to catch up for my sanity. P.S. I've been doing laundry since Friday- I'm still not done. :(
I want to thank you all very much for your words of support and encouragement. I swear it helps and it gets me through these times and makes it seem not-so-hard. Since I rambled on last, I have aced two tests, gotten my house clean and filled the fridge and pantry. See how much you matter? Leaps and bounds, baby!
I saw this post over at Christy's and I thought it was pretty fun so in the spirit of keeping this short so I can actually sleep tonight, here goes: (Google your name plus the word needs and see what comes up!)
1. Teresa needs : to lay of the sauce! If that is referring to taco sauce, then yes, I do.
2. Teresa needs: one more miracle to become a saint. Ummm, not so much.
3. Teresa needs: you. Now more than ever!
4. Teresa needs: to build her own solid foundation. I think I've done a pretty good job with this one...it comes with age.
5.Teresa needs: to be a bit more secure with herself and relax. Totally.
6. Teresa needs: a finishing school. I don't, but several in my class, however.....
7. Teresa needs: to make a hard business decision. Not tonight- I'm way too tired.
8. Teresa needs: to vent from time to time. Duh.
9. Teresa needs: to raise $65,000. Just enough to pay for daycare.
10. Teresa needs: to know......
What do you need?

On My Own

Remember Irene Cara and the song/video "She Works Hard for the Money" and she comes home from working hard for the money only to walk into a disastrous mess made by the kids and a worthless husband? Well, that has been my life for two days...minus the worthless husband- he's anything but worthless, he's just absent.
I started Dental Assistant school on Monday (my first step toward becoming a hygienist) and have left the boys at home to maintain themselves for the 4 hours I'm in class since they don't begin school until Thursday. (Why start on a Thursday?) Anyway, I guess I wasn't specific enough when I said 'be good, don't touch the stove and keep the doors locked.' What I should have said was 'If you make a gigantic mess while I'm gone there will be swift beatings to follow.'
There was a trail of clothing from the kitchen/garage entry through the foyer, up the stairs and all the way to their room. Were they afraid they would get lost between the kitchen and the bedroom or were they trying to see how many clothes they could string through the house just for kicks? Who knows. I made the mistake of asking them to try on some of the clothes I just bought them to see if they would fit. I wasn't specific enough with that statement either.
Through the maze of clothes, I trip on light sabers, & a football and then stumble to the table to find a huge breakfast mess of juice glasses tipped over by cats and oatmeal 'cement' stuck inside the bowls. Now, keep in mind I have not raised my boys like this. I have tried to instill the importance of picking up after yourself and being a contributing part of the family. I felt like I walked into a frat house and they were surprised by the Den Mother paying a visit.
I'm still keeping it together, not screaming just yet until I get a good whiff of my all time pet peeve- the litter box. I swore that if I ever smelled the litter box while coming through the front door I would give the kitties away to another loving family. I despise that smell. It's also one of their daily jobs to maintain it and empty the receptacle every other day since we have two cats. We have an automatic litter box that, up until today, I really loved. It's broken. The motor got off the track somehow and now it's a little crooked and won't stop going back and forth unless you manually flip the switch. I still haven't given up but my patience is definitely running out. I clean the entire thing out and put new litter in all while sweating to death, gagging from the smell and thinking I should be studying right now because the baby is sleeping. I flip the top of it over that houses the motor for the scooper and try to see if I can 'muscle' it and get the turning wheel on the right track. After 45 minutes and flipping litter in my face and practically breaking the stupid thing I threw in the towel and started to sob. That's right. I sobbed like I have never sobbed before and the boys are looking at my like I finally have gone Coo-Coo for Cocoa Puffs and need to be institutionalized. 'Why is Mom crying over the cat box,' Soccer asks innocently. I just keep sobbing.
It's not the silly litter box- it's the day in and day out of doing it all on my own. I'm not ashamed or feel like less of a woman for not knowing how to fix a stupid motor on a litter box. I'm not ashamed for wishing the man of the house were here to fix the small stuff that breaks every once in awhile. I am ashamed, however, for losing it in front of Soccer and Football and throwing a mountain sized tantrum in the process. Lately- I feel I can't control my emotions. That small, insignificant happenings send me over the edge. There are times I feel like I can't think or multi-task like a normal mom should be able to. What has happened to me? I've been here before and yet I feel like it's the first time I've had to be a single mom for a few months.
I know that I need to take a deep breath and not sweat the small stuff but for some reason, I'm not following that advice. I need to change something or think back to when I've done this before and try to remember what I did just to stay sane. The only thing I can think of is that I had other military spouses next door for support. Right now, living here in this beautiful place, I am truly alone. It's a tough pill to swallow.

1 Down and 7 To Go!

Do you know what monumental thing I missed yesterday? Look:

Notice in the far right corner on Saturday the 9th. HOORAY, YIPEE, WOOHOO!!!!!!
I was filling out my August calendar (Iknow, 10 days late, whatever) on the fridge and realized we have put a whole month under our belts. How's that for time flying? It's like I blinked and it just flew by. I couldn't have felt this way if I hadn't gone on a road trip for 2 weeks that's for sure! Now, tomorrow, I'm starting school. (I'll post on that after my first day) Hopefully time will just continue to fly and we'll keep counting down the months.
I had originally thought to write about how crappy my day was. How my toddler will not let me have a moment to myself unless she's sleeping. How the stress has been strangling me all day because I am on my own. The only adult trying to keep up with this house and the bills and the chaos. Trying to send video mail every chance I get just to make him happy even when the kids won't cooperate and I hate looking at myself in it because I'm 30 pounds overweight. Then, I filled out my calendar. I'm encouraged. Drained, but encouraged. I know I can do this because it won't last forever and look at how the time passed by. Now, I've taken a deep breath, pulled some strength and calm from somewhere and feel I can possibly get through the evening without going to get a six-pack.......maybe!

Big Fan of Technology!

My soldier sent me this wicked cool computer camera from Logitech so that we can video chat as soon as he gets his laptop over there sometime in September. In the meantime, we can record video and take pictures and send them to him over e-mail with this incredible device and this is the first one I sent to him this morning:

Get a load of that bed-head!! Is this cool or what? I am so amazed at how easy it was to install and figure out how to use. I am in love. I am so computer - stupid too so you know it's super easy if I figured it out! Just thought I'd share a great moment with you. BTW, Dada loved it and he can't stop watching it. I've sent him more of the boys and he is just in heaven. I can't wait until he gets his on the other end! Bye for now...

To Vent and To Ramble

Ok- so this week is a hustle and bustle kind of week with orientations- my boys and mine- and the start of football practice and, well you know the deal.

So upon going to orientation for Soccer they discovered he didn't have a TB test on his records anywhere and it was, of course, required. I'm sure some military medic somewhere along the way forgot to write it down and now it's another errand on my list. How many of you have thought you've checked all the blocks, had all the necessary paperwork to include most of the contents of your entire file cabinet just to be safe and was so on top of things it's scary? Well so did I. No big deal, I thought. I'll go and get this TB test done and then, finally we will be all set.

I'm not sure anyone outside of the military life understands the hoops and hurdles that must be gone through in order to start your child at a new school. Every single state is different. Every single county is different. Every single school is different. It's really hard to keep up. With every change of residence it's like starting them in kindergarten all over again. Remember that?

So, anyway, that's the least of my issues considering I've done it about a thousand times and I've come to terms with it and have accepted this life and will endure the process. What I have issue with was the simple task of getting my child an appointment just to have this done. The military health care system is overloaded and understaffed therefore when calling the necessary number given to my soldier to give to me before deploying (supposedly a sure) thing I think I was transferred about 4 times. No lie. I was transferred, in my opinion, because everyone would rather pass you off to someone else instead of trying to help you because they are overloaded and day in and day out they tend to become tired of us simple Moms wanting annoying shots and tests like Soccer needs. God help me if any of the children get really sick.

I finally reach someone in the pediatric office to which Soccer is assigned and praise the Lord, I actually spoke to a nurse who was sympathetic, kind and did everything she could to point me in the right direction. She was my angel amongst chaos. Unfortunately, the nightmare doesn't end there.

Turns out I didn't need an appointment, I had to go to a different building up in the mountains somewhere and once there, find the immunization clinic. Ok, no problem, I have a GPS -the baby is at daycare and I can concentrate on finding the place. Found it.....wrong freakin' building....AGAIN! Before having a temper tantrum, the sort of disgruntled lady at the lab said there was a trailer somewhere outside and that's where I needed to go.

Me: "Can you tell me where the trailer is?"

Jackass behind the counter: "I really don't know, but I know it's out there".

Ummm, I'm dead serious. Scary, right?

Here we go again and I'm just trying to be thankful that T-Monkey isn't with us and whining, the boys are old enough to not throw a gigantic fit because they are hungry and after all, I could use the extra steps of exercise.

I found the trailer. Right outside and to left of the hospital. The donkey woman doesn't see it everyday as she goes to work and knows she has to direct thousands of misdirected people everyday? Oy.

Anyway, I go in and think "everything is ok now, we've made it, I have records and both sets of ID and a note from Mom. This should be a breeze now." Wrong. Let me tell you this is where I almost got arrested. Keep in mind we are Army dependents using an Air Force Base. I didn't think it was a big deal but apparently the idiot AF specialist behind the counter did.

Me: "I need a TB test for my son, please."

Her: "Do you have his shot records?"

Me: "I don't have the yellow booklet thingy that used to be used but I do have his records and all of his shots are documented in there"

Her: "Well, that's not going to do me any good because how will I record it?"

Me: "At our last post, they didn't record in the yellow books, they printed out a sheet and stuck in his medical records."

Her: " Are you Army?" (not in a nice tone or way either)

Me: "yes."

Her: " We don't SPEAK to the Army"

Pause: Ok, am I in the twilight zone? Is this really happening? Am I having this conversation while I'm awake? Who the heck are you to tell me you don't speak to the Army? Ok- taking a deep breath now and calming down because it's all going to be ok and I don't want to be handcuffed in front of my sons for reaching behind that counter and grabbing that smart-ass by the collar and asking for her commander.

Me: "Well, do you have a print out that looks just like the one I have here in my hand that I, myself, will be capable of adding to his records?"

Her: "Well, yeah."

Me: "Can he have the test then because if one more person reroutes me and tells me that I don't have the necessary documents, I might have to start asking for supervisors and commanders and then it can all go down hill from there."

Her: "Yes, I never said he couldn't have the test. Bring him on back."



Ok, I want to cause her bodily harm. Keep in mind that I really try to keep a smile on my face, say excuse me in public, say thank you when someone holds the door open for me and even go out of my way to help someone if I see a situation that warrants it no matter what kind of time line I'm on. It's the way I was brought up. I feel that this earth needs people to be kind to one another and not be in such a hurry and give each other a happy face once in awhile just for good measure. You never know, it could make someone's day.

Today, there was just so much that I could take and I really believe these people were giving me a hard time because we're Army. Excuse me, aren't we all on the same side? Don't we need all of the services to work together during war time, etc.? So what the hell makes the difference if I'm Army or Navy or blue or whatever? No offense to Air Force spouses out there. I know you, in particular, are not the ones behind the desk. I hope and pray that our Army system treats the other services with respect and kindness regardless of who you play for. And if any of you have experienced what I have within the Army system, I apologize profusely on their behalf. In my opinion, it's completely unacceptable.

Photo Contest

5 Minutes For Mom is having a photo contest for your favorite all time summer fun photo and the winner will win $500. Do you know what I could do with $500? A whole lot considering I'm about to start daycare for T-Monkey and two boys that need school clothes and, well the list goes on and on! Here's my submission:

This is a photo taken at the beginning of summer in Branson, Missouri. This is our soldier with his baby girl enjoying one of her all time favorite animals. She kept 'moo-ing' as we would pass cows on the way home so Daddy stopped the car and took her to see one up close. It will be one of my all time favorite summer time photos for many years to come. What a great memory!

We've Come Full Circle

Hey there! It has been way too long since I blogged last but I didn't really have great Internet access at my sister's home in Muncie , IN so I just opted not to stress and enjoy my time and write when we got home.
From my sister's home in IN it is a good 18 hours drive back to my home in Colorado. I obviously decided to get a hotel room half way since I was the only driver and I would like for my kids to see their next birthdays. They are good travelers for the most part but a few hours of my daughter speaking 'toddler' with no one figuring out what she truly wants, my teenager giving me a play by play of what's happening on his PSP college football game and my tween making fun of the Elmo movie that's been playing for hours on end- I think stopping half way, having a nice dinner and swimming at a hotel seemed like the best chance for their safety.
We stopped in Topeka, Kansas at the Holiday Inn. Wouldn't you know it they were having a marriage retreat there for couples from Fort Riley for soldiers and their spouses who were about to endure a deployment. Go figure. Good for them, however. I wish we could have had a weekend of therapy and babysitting before he left! But, I didn't let my mind settle on that because all 3 kids were about to pee their pants after seeing the gigantic twisty-turney water slide in the middle of the hotel. They couldn't get changed and get there fast enough! We ate dinner, reluctantly, and then spent two hours playing in the pool. I didn't think T-monkey was even going to get in with no baby pool but by the time we were all done, she was jumping in without holding my fingers. Dang it.

Football & Soccer enjoying the slide...

T-Monkey the first time she jumped in by herself!

We left Topeka this a.m. with a temperature of 104 and 100% humidity. Nice. Brings back memories of living in Kansas the last two years and almost re-living the Louisiana experience...it's way to hot and gross there to even mention. The long and boring 8 hour drive on I-70 through the rest of Kansas is enough to make you want to drink in the middle of the day but we finally made it to Colorado and stopped at a gift shop/travel plaza to walk around and grab a quick bite before driving the last hour home. I realized after going in it was the same place my soldier and I had stopped after finding a home in February to buy the kids a CO keepsake to get them excited for our new home. That brought a sweet memory! T-Monkey made herself at home with a huge bear right in the middle of the store and a sign behind it that says " Hug Me, Colorado Welcomes You!"....... I love this place.

T-Monkey and the best Teddy Bear she's ever laid eyes on.

So, now we're home and we're rested and we'll have to adjust to the altitude and time change all over again. But, really, it was all worth it to visit with family and have the last two weeks just fly by!

We have 3 and a half weeks under our belts now- can you believe it?!